Tag Archives: life

I am so congested right now.


But yay! happy birthday to me!!! :) I’m officially 25.  None the wiser (except maybe a lesson or two about men and tennis). A few extra scars, including the one on my knee, that I banged up on new year’s day and had to go to the fire station for bandages (they don’t carry those; in their carry-on size first aid kit, they have no bandages).

This past year, I finally feel like I’m getting a grasp on how to take care of myself.  I don’t mean paying the bills on time or remembering to take out the garbage.  I just mean all the little things that seem to pop up in life that no one seems to tell you about until you graduated college, and you’re like FUCK!  The shiny car they promised you after all this studying is really a vespa, and you just bought a full sized mattress from IKEA.  How the hell am I supposed to fit it… Okay, bad analogy.  Blame it on the NyQuil.  (Which I don’t know how to spell, but I can’t go check the label because *confession* I really bought the cheap CVS alternative.)

Okay, so maybe a little bit wiser.  But our 20s aren’t necessarily about gaining tons of brains and skills, like those of our teen years.  This year, I’m more okay with myself and my limitations.  I’m no longer the smartest person in class, and I’m okay with that (darn you, Patrick!).  I can’t drive through a wall unscathed.  Eight year old are capable of stealing my iPhone.  And I’m okay with that.

Last week was one of the shiteous weeks of my life.  Emotionally, physically, and mentally.  But I survived (thanks mostly to my friends are holding me together and picking up the pieces).  And whether I bomb a test or an ex enjoys rubbing salt in my wounds, I can deal with it and move on.

So bring it on, world!  I’m ready for the 25th year.  Show me what you got. (But please try to be nice.  I seriously am sick and it’s not nice hit people when they’re down… or to hit girls…)

P.S.  BIG ups to Kun, Asher and Stacey.  Without you guys, I would not have survived last week.


Filed under just life

Fear of Life

It’s a fear of failure.  One so strong that you forget who you are and what you really want in life.  At one point in time, I wanted to join the Peace Corps.  I want to become an artist because something innate in me wants to experience life, interpret it and share it.  I was sarcastic as hell, sometimes acerbic, hugely real and a true ENTJ.

But expectations from parents and competition to keep at the top has worn me down.  I’m not taking it anymore.  This is the end of censoring myself.  On janyxu.com and everywhere else.

The internets is so damn open nowadays.  One wrong post or rant and what will my future employers think?  Will my elementary school friends think less of me?  Well, this is me.  No, I’m not going to rant and rave at work.  Nor will I be quite so blunt and tactless.  But somewhere out there, there’s a real me.  And I’m tired of writing tens of drafts, only to be too concerned with public perception to push the “Publish” button.

To hell with it.  Even if I write industry related posts, this is still my personal blog.  I’m taking back my “online personal brand.”

I’m a great marketer with a firm grasp on branding strategies, industry analysis, positioning statements, and vendor relations along with web/graphic design expertise, Social Media savvy and solid record of ROI.  That’s what employers should look at and ask for.

These are my ruminations.  You’re welcome to read them, comment and give your feedback.  But how I’m perceived online should be controlled by me.  My professional profile is available and will be available soon.  My personal online life deserves an equal, yet divided setting.  What I write shouldn’t affect my work (in a perfect environment).


Filed under just life

Best Christmas Present & Stalking Babies

This is a long set up (and the image will make sense later).

1. So we have table topics at our Toastmasters meetings, in which anyone could contribute on a given topic.  Last time around, the question was “how has the economy affected your holiday spirit?”

I answered that I can see some bright side effects of the economy.  Namely:

  • On a totally selfish level, I’m young enough to have not lost an insurmountable sum in the market.  This is a great time to invest at a discount (or sell short for the next year?).
  • On a national level, the market has brought home that hubris and the “everyone can have everything” spirit have damaging effects.  I’m hoping that the faltering economy will give American a wake-up call to be wiser about what we can really afford and how to best make long term plans.
  • On a holiday level, well… the holidays are about bringing people together.  And for too long, that’s meant gift giving.  Now that people are cutting back, we’ll see more gifts from the heart (if not at a bargain).  Besides, isn’t there a saying that tough times bring people together?

2. My parents didn’t know what to get my for Christmas this year… as it happens every year.  (I’m one of those lucky bastards who has everything she needs and many of the things she wants. :-) )   So I told them they could buy me book shelves.  Most of my books have been stacked on the floor, and they were a huge mess.

So I bought some IKEA book shelves, laid them on their side and made half of my living room into a reading/crafts area.  I have to say, it turned out nicely.  (Also, dragging two 50lb boxes from the shelves to the register to into the car and up a flight of stairs all by myself ended being good exercise.)


Here’s the pay off: Christmas this year wasn’t about the material gifts.  My real Christmas present this year was going home to Texas and seeing my dad’s fish have babies.


I grew up in a household without any pets.  My mom isn’t a fan of animals, and while my dad loves them (yes, all of them),he agrees that they generally make a mess, cost to maintain and need sitters when we’re on vacation.  Well, since I’ve moved to the Bay Area, and they’re empty nesters, they decided to invest in some fish.  Very low maintenance and hours of entertainment for my cat, when she visits.

Growing up without pets, having even fish in the house is a huge change.  Better still is when I go home for Christmas and one of the guppies decides to give birth.  What’s amazing about guppies (and Wikipedia and the iPhone at 3am) is that they give live births, a.k.a. little fish pop out instead of fish eggs.


Here’s my chronicle of their development.


Day 1


The guppy started giving birth of a few of fish as a time.  My mom spotted them first.  Sadly, one (or more because we don’t know) was eaten by the other fish.  It was so small that one of the red fish gobbled it up with a quick bite.  My dad zipped to Petsmart and bought a breeding tank (basically a plastic holder with holes that floats in the tank and separates the babies from the other fish).  My mom helped scoop them into a plastic cup, while dad was gone.  Then, we transfered them into the breeding tank. In total, there are 11 babies.  That doubles the total number of fish in the tank.


Day 2


They’ve already doubled in size.  You can’t really make it out in this picture, but their eyes have a silver outline and aren’t completely black anymore.  There’s some red starting to show on their stomachs.  We can’t really tell if it’s just blood circulating or pigmentation.


Day 3


They’ve gotten a lot bigger.  You can see them floating around, while before, you had to squint.  They’re definitely developing a red pigment to their skin… err scales.  Their stomachs are getting rounder and the skeletal system is becoming more visible.  Two of them seem to be smaller, more agile and lighter colored than the other.  I’m starting to think back on genetics lessons from high school.


Just FYI, here’s a scale of reference.  Below is a reflection of my finger pressed up against the glass as I’m trying to take a photo.

P.S.  HUGE props to Canon.  This isn’t taken with an SLR.  It’s just a quick and dirty point and shoot PowerShot by Canon.  The baby fish were probably 2-3 millimeters long at birth, and I got some great shots… even as an amateur photographer. (Okay, the marketing side of me is shutting up now.)



Sadly, I had to leave for the Bay Area after Day 3.  I’m not sure if my parents will religiously take photos of them on a daily basis, like I did.  But there will be more updates, when I go home in the future.

It’s just that I’ve never been around babies, animal or human.  Plants maybe, but not animals.  So watching these little fish grow bigger on a daily basis is absolutely fascinating to me.  I thought I’d share. :-)

Merry Christmas.  Happy Hanukkah.  All around happiness.

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Filed under just life, pr/marketing, social

You Can’t Read

I debated whether to call this entry “lipstick on a pig” but I don’t want to lead you on. This post isn’t about Sarah Palin or the comments that Barack Obama made about the McCain campaign. I agree with most of the blogs out there that Obama was wrong to use that phrase, and the Obama Camp should be focusing on the fact that we don’t know who the hell Sarah Palin is versus whether or not the phrase should be deemed offensive to her. But that’s practically beside the point. This post is about me.

It’s 11:47pm as I’m blogging right now. And given that I’ve been to the Seesmic party (happy anniversary) post TechCrunch50 (technically 52), I’m a little buzzed. People always advise against drunk dialing much less drunk blogging. That’s isn’t the case here. I’m just trying to be candid. (It also doesn’t help that I woke up early this morning to start drinking mimosas at the Powerset/the Rubicon Project Rehab party at Mighty.)


A friend commented that Get Smart was a decent movie. Not moving but worth the watch. So I rented it today on the way to grab my 1 month supply of cat food and some Duvel (trust me, the sales clerk at Trader Joe’s definitely gave me a weird look).

My interpretation of the movie is quite different. You see, last weekend, I took the test that I’d been dreading most of my life: the Mensa test. And for the first time in my life, I’m pretty damn sure I failed the test and am not in fact among the prestigious 98%. But after watching the movie (spoiler alert?), I don’t really give.

Sure Get Smart is like every other off-beat comedy: witty, comic and 2 hours of my life. After this week of worrying about whether or not I had the privilege to call myself smart than everyone, I had a complete epiphany: IT DOESN’T MATTER. It doesn’t define ‘success,’ at least not the way I see it. And it certainly doesn’t define ‘happiness,’ that evasive term that everyone uses but few know the meaning.

What should matter in your life is what you hold dear. Not your parents. Not your friends. And certainly not your culture (mine is filled with grossly ill-defined body images, sex, porn, monetary success and of course… more porn).

And what matters in my life right now is the relationships I have with people. I realize that I’m truly sarcastic and could stand to brush up on my Bay Area social skills. I’m a really nice person. I’m fiercely loyal and a great listener. But sometimes I just don’t translate. I understand that I’ll never been as zen as Chris. I know that when I told Jennifer this morning that I hate Carrie Bradshaw (too unrealistic) but still loved her blog concept, I was being truthful and she probably didn’t believe me (understandable, totally my own doing). I know that I am amazed at what Jeremy was able to create on the Seesmic blog. I know that when my boss, Parry, told me that I was a good artist today that I should have just said thanks instead of commenting that Julie‘s caricature really wasn’t proportional.

I just can’t help myself. I’m trying. Really. I am. And I’m kinda hoping that by being honest right now, you will help me in my quest.

So thank you for the patience. Thanks for reading. But I’m far from perfect. And (here comes the after school special), I’m hoping people will like/love me all the same.


Filed under just life, social

Something About a Beanstalk

People who blog know that it’s a lot of work. So I’m taking this entry to shirk my responsibilities and just write in a stream of consciousness manner.

Two years out of college (okay, 2 years and 3 months but don’t tell anyone), I’ve gained some insight on life, a sense of what I might want to accomplish in my career and 20 lbs. What’s more, I thought I knew everything in college and now, I feel like I know nothing at all. Yes, it’s a bit cliche, but it’s not just what I don’t know in marketing; marketing, as we know it, is changing completely. Okay, there will still be the 3 Cs (company, consumer, competitors), the 4 Ps (product, price, placement, promotion), the infamous SWOT (strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, threats), Porter’s 5 forces plus internet and a plethora of other acronyms that’s supposed to make us marketing/consulting types look smart… err… find the right niche in target markets, branding and profitability. But how we communicate to our audience is forever changing (hopefully for the better).

Living through that change and watching PR professionals blunder and companies fail is painful. But the future is also bright. And I think I’m starting to get the hang of it. Not that I know everything, but I’m starting to understand the process by which I can stay ahead of the curve, constantly try new things and fail a few times myself.

So what do I do?

  • Read my Google Reader religiously
    • Interests include design, PR, marketing, communications, technology, news, consumer blogs and lolcats/pundit kitchen/fail blog to keep me coming back.
  • Read lots of books
  • Attend interesting events and parties
  • Talk to people
  • Pray a little
  • Study my own strengths and weaknesses through working with other people, meeting new people and mixing in other interests (graphic design, web design, Tumbling, drawing, reading, etc.)
  • Trying new things… websites, programs, etc.
  • Through trial and error, find out where my strengths and my interests intersect.
    • I’m good at designing things, I like social media, and I love strategy (no examples b/c I like my PR agency and want them to keep liking me :-) ).
    • But… I’m an early adopter compared to most of my friends but a lagger within the social media realm. Just because I know how something works, doesn’t mean I want to adopt it personally. The same is true for companies who are interested in adopting social media in their marketing. They need to understand what part of social media makes the most sense for them. If their customers blog, then they should learn how to communicate via the comments section or even try it out themselves. If their industry is Web 2.0 (ugh) facing, they should try everything hire a community manager.

I’m still not ‘there’ yet in terms to knowing what’s my ultimate career goal. With lots of help from my manager (hands down, so amazing that I will join a “my manager is better than your manager” competition, if one exists, and kick all y’all asses! :-P ) and lots of time doing the above, I’m slowly getting there.

I feel like we should all hold hands and sing Kumbaya now… Yeah, definitely bedtime. :-)

Good night, internets!

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Save a life

A worthy cause: help give hope to those who’ve lost it.

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New Favorite Game:

I know it’s as we speak spreading like Wildfire on Tumblr, but I wanted to introduce this to everyone.

It’s a great way to practice your typing skills, while putting a bit of competition in.

Click here to visit.

I are obsessed.  (Click for larger image.)

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