An Education

I’ve been blessed with so much in my life.  Friends who deeply care for me.  Parents who would lay there lives on the line (and have) to give me everything that I could possibly need and now that I could possibly want.  (Seriously, it’s impossible for me to come up with a birthday wish list because I’m so freakin’ spoiled.)

Now before you stop reading and completely write me off as some spoiled “rich bitch” (yes, I’ve been called that, and yes, quite frankly, I am), just spare me a moment.

I am spoiled.  I’m blessed to be spoiled.  I’m an only-child and honestly, don’t know any different.

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But I’ve learned.  It’s hard to trust someone when you’re the center of the world… at least that’s my parents’ perspective.

A really close friend of mine blabbed on me.  I got rotten drunk and cried over the poor children around the world and how undeserving I am to be exactly where I am. It seems to silly.  But every single one of us who has a warm place to stay and food in our bellies are absolutely lucky and absolutely blessed… by god or otherwise.

… And I’m beyond that.  I don’t have to share any of myself or life with anyone.

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So why am I writing this?  To rub it in your face?

Actually, no.  Because I’ve learned (several years past college and past due) how to share.  How to be kind and be patient.  It’s really, heart-achingly hard for me. To trust someone not to hurt me.  Or to share something that supposed to be mine and no expect anything in return.

An obviously, almost stupid concept.  Yet, it’s so hard for so many of us to grasp.

I’m not quite there yet.  I still hold dear some objects in my life (like my car) that I would trust just 2 people to drive (that doesn’t even include my mother… sorry mom).  But I am learning.

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Point?  I’m really proud of what I’ve accomplished in the last three years.  You can’t necessarily see it on my resume or my Facebook.  But I’m holistically different. I’m willing to share a bit of myself and open up to my friends and to trust them.  To learn patience.

Perception has made a huge difference in my life.  I’m… dare I say… at the moment… remarkably happy.

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