Entries from March 2008

March 11, 2008

thillythenny twuly thilly :)

I’m going through so many effing emotions now, it’s not even funny.  Emilie, Charlotte and I had a great laugh about that woman’s comments yesterday.  (Thank you thank you thank you for showing me how silly I was acting.) 
Funny how I’m functional all weekend, had a great time at the movies, at the hockey game, walking [...]

March 10, 2008

Just one more, I promise

I Just got this reponse, and I am bawling (sp?)… on the floor laughing of course:
Thank you for taking the time to respond Thilly Thenny.
Believe me, I am nobody to “Judge”.. however, when you post your blogs for the public to read, be prepared for constructive criticism.
I know it may be hard for you.. but [...]

March 10, 2008

Wake up!

On the other hand, maybe that renegade  commenter mentioned in the last post did me a favor.  I may not be desperate, but I am bitter.  And there’s way too much going on my life for that.
Point 1: Yes, I’ve lived such a protected life that I’ve never had someone screw me over like that [...]

March 10, 2008

Dear random stranger

who decided to try and mess up my day,
 Yes, I realize Oscar doesn’t want to be with me.  I, in fact, do have a life, a great job, friends, etc.  I’m also involved in various club organizations outside of work to develop my leadership skills and pad my resume.  The point is, I do have [...]

March 10, 2008

Need some positive energy in my life

don’t hold your breath, just breathe
simply receive, remain open
give and let be
breathe
no expectations, but palms lay open
face upward
look inward
move forward
breathe
inhale invisible ecstacy
exhale knotted entropy
don’t queeze
just breathe
please.
Thanks, Seher.

March 10, 2008

Bad combination

angry + horny

What I really want to do right now (but will not do) is kidnap you and Rouselyn.  Slice you open, crack your sternum and separate your ribs, and make you watch me force feed her your heart during your last moments of life.   Because you fucking gave it to her right?  I’m just [...]

March 10, 2008

I’m not okay.

I thought I was.  I knew this would come.  I’m just not.

March 9, 2008

I’m a little bit scared

not to be single.  actually looking forward to that part.
no.  scared that at any point in time someone can just walk out of my life.  no contact.  nothing.  like they don’t care anymore.  i don’t remember the last time that’s happened.  there’s always been some period of discussion and getting over things.
this is new.  i [...]

March 7, 2008

I don’t know love

I thought I did, but now I realize I’ve never had it.  I gave so much for the notion, but really it was lust in disguise.  And not just lust for sex.  Lust for love, the emotions, the whirlwind, the reason to live.
So I’ll be more patient next time and allow things to flow.
And maybe [...]

March 7, 2008

love, why are you evading me?

and dressing up in a mysterious fabric that I can never grasp on to.
why do you send me people who only wound me heart?
people who are selfish and don’t understand my logic?
I’m hurt.  In shock.  And I don’t think I’m strong enough.  Yet I do at the same time.
I want to cry, and I know the [...]