I think the reason I’ve been faily sane this week, when in fact I should be barely able to get out of bed, is that it’s still the week. We usually don’t get to see each other during the week. Each of us is busy in our own way. But now that the weekend’s arriving, I’m really going to have to face up to the fact that I’m alone… well maybe not alone but single. I don’t want to be. And I’m not ready to not be again. It pretty much sucks all around.
Laura told me today that I was really smart in ending the relationship because if it doesn’t work, better now than later. Haha… I’m so weak. I didn’t do anything. I basically left the impossible decision to him, knowing full well what the outcome will probably be. It sucks. It’s utterly not fair. I’m so stupid and impatient. IF I could just wait things out… There are so many of those: ifs. I guess there isn’t anything i can do about it now. The truth is out there, and there isn’t any going back. I’m just going to have to take it and hope that I made the right decision.
bah.
